Tag: xander

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Episode 93 – I Was Made to Love You

Real girls are spongy.

I bounce off them
and ricochet around the room,
leaving splats of color 
on the walls and the floors,

dripping 
oozing 
spilling

into crevices and corners,

finger painting
the imperfect lines of their bodies,
wiping off the colors
to reveal the skin beneath.

* * *

She was a robot 
for love.
A girl
made of bolts and screws.

The perfect woman.

Programmed to hug,
kiss and caress.
To always say yes 
to his every whim.

Built to love.
Built to cook.
No baggage.
No needs.
Just pure devotion.

Even that wasn’t enough.
Everything he wanted
wasn’t really what he wanted.

And everything she had to give
really wasn’t enough.

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Episode 92 – Crush

I am blinded by your memory.
The waters sailed now make me seasick.

Do you think I like you in my heart,
gnawing holes until it hangs in lacy strings? 

Love is strangling me, like a madman in the night.
Like an arrow in my back, love attacks me.

You slam love in my face like a door
and I choose to believe it means you care.

I see you in blue, all soft around the edges.
In the end, we’re all soft around the edges.

I can be good if you need good.
I can drown in good if you can swim.

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Episode 91 – Blood Ties

My life 
is a series of memories –
of mom in the kitchen,
of dad’s disappearance.
But they’re not real,
my memories.
All lies.

I wash away 
like a sand castle
as the tide comes in,
leaving broken shells
and scattered seaweed.

Every story I’ve ever told
a myth, 
a cloud drifting by.
Not a girl
who was born
and grew up
and can now die
of sadness for never
really being alive.

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Episode 89 – Triangle

He’s gone.
Three seconds on the clock.
The red wire
or the green.
Will I cut the right one
or will I explode
in tears 
or in grief
over his departure?

No.
I’m fine
actually.

I took down his pictures,
but not because I’m angry.
Well, I am angry,
but not like I don’t want
to see his face again.

I’d like to see his face again.
It’s a good face.

Guess it was coming for awhile.
Everyone saw it but me.
Things I should have said,
didn’t see.
A trail of destruction
spread out behind me.
Like a god
with his hammer,
I destroy.

He asked me for a reason to stay,
but I was too long in finding one.
If you have to look,
the reason isn’t good enough 
anyway.

I’m fine
actually.

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Episode 88 – Into the Woods

My heart is woven with the blood of others. 
Perfect dance partners.

He doesn’t look back.
He never looks back.
A hole the size of the world
blows right through us.

Give me pain.
Give me something.
Give me a reason to stay.

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Episode 87 – Listening to Fear

sometimes she doesn’t 
remember me

her daughter

a shadow visible 
only in darkness

* * *

A star dies, but its light keeps us company,
its death unmourned for generations.
I feel sad to see the sparkle.

The moon invokes madness, its light hurts my eyes.

I search for Cassiopeia 
on her tortuous throne, 
her beauty unrivaled.

Holding tight to my sanity, the moon passes over.

As we flame through the sky, 
will anyone remember?

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Episode 86 – Shadow

He wants to be her knight,
but she doesn’t need saving.

* * *

Boys before
kept her in tears,
kept her in chains.

Holes ripped 
in the world
by their passion.

With you
she feels less 
     pain.

She feels 
     less.

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Episode 85 – Fool for Love

The vampire princess asked him to join her
and he saw the light no more.

He was gentle once, before his soul was taken,
penning piles of pitiful sonnets filled with longing.

The dark girl found his gentleness charming, 
but loved him even more when he was wicked.

So he was wicked.

Her perfect poet and provocateur 
made powerful by blood and by love.

A century later, she abandoned him, and the heart 
that ceased to beat the night she turned him

tore apart.

Only forbidden love began to mend 
his heart’s tattered secrets.  The Slayer.

A spirit so hot to the touch it burned him nightly.
She made him cry.  She made him rage.
He was covered in her, consumed by her,

concerned for her.

He was in love and she wanted him dead.
He wanted to breathe her in, but he had no breath.

Here begins his journey to recover the soul 
he lost so long ago.  To give birth again to the poet within.

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Episode 84 – Family

Cast out by false fathers 
who profess love
but imprison creativity,

she finds herself in the company 
of those she despises,
trying to hide her true face,

what’s bad inside her
legend told by fathers who seek
to keep their women weak.

The only weak woman 
is the one 
who doesn’t know herself.

Oh, tell me a story 
of she who begins
unwanted and then is chosen.